“Stupid is as stupid…reincarnates”?

nicholas kristoff
Nicholas Kristof of the New York Times.
This has got to be the dumbest fucking thing I’ve read all millenia.
In a recent opinion column of Mr. Kristof’s he waxes philosophically with his pal Tenzin Gatsyo also affectionately known as the 14th Dalai Lama, about the obvious reality of the Lama’s impending reincarnation (he just turned 80) and its far-ranging political implications. If you think most of us are living in the 21st century, guess again. Some of us spiritualists on the planet insist we are still living with only medieval levels of knowledge. Thereby souls and their most excellent reincarnation are a unquestioned mundane occurrence to be chatted about like one’s going to the grocery store. They even discuss the particulars of how reincarnation works. It would be comical if it wasn’t so utterly delusional.

Mr. Kristof speaks:
“He is the 14th Dalai Lama, each considered a reincarnation of the previous one, and usually after one has died a search is undertaken for an infant to become the next. But he has said that he may be the last of the line, or that the next Dalai Lama might emerge outside Tibet — or might even be a girl.”
“This talk infuriates Beijing, which is determined to choose the next Dalai Lama (to use as a tool to control Tibet).

And the Lama:
“The Chinese Communist Party is pretending that they know more about the reincarnation system than the Dalai Lama,” said the Dalai Lama, laughing. “The Chinese Communists should accept the concept of rebirth. Then they should recognize the reincarnation of Chairman Mao Zedong, then Deng Xiaoping. Then they have the right to involve themselves in the Dalai Lama’s reincarnation.”

Yes. Of course! The good Lama and Mr. Kristof got the real lowdown on the subject. Silly Commies. How dare they challenge the experts, who without question know ALL about reincarnation!
The level of delusional thinking that they display is beyond ridiculous. It is at once pathetic and arrogant as hell. Like any good conspiracy theory it gives them a feeling of superiority of thinking they know how the world REALLY works and the other schmucks don’t. Such is the seductive pull of religious delusion in any form.

I’ve taken the good Lama himself to task in this blog before here, here, and here for his blatantly unscientific, preposterous and primitive claims and beliefs. He may be a nice guy personally but he is a consummate peddler of woo so absurd that he makes Deepak Chopra sound like a die hard realist by comparison.

From the Dalai’s own website section on the intricacies of Lama reincarnation I have excerpted 3 short paragraphs from over 7 pages and 4,000 words of insane confabulation wherein he authoritatively expounds on the subject:
“For more than 600 years since Gedun Drub, a series of unmistaken reincarnations has been recognised in the lineage of the Dalai Lama. 

In order to accept reincarnation or the reality of Tulkus, we need to accept the existence of past and future lives. Sentient beings come to this present life from their previous lives and take rebirth again after death.”
“Therefore, the title of Tulku is given to reincarnate Lamas either on the grounds of their resembling enlightened beings or through their connection to certain qualities of enlightened beings.”

And to recognize such incarnations:
“…additional methods include asking reliable spiritual masters for their divination as well as seeking the predictions of mundane oracles, who appear through mediums in trance, and observing the visions that manifest in sacred lakes of protectors like Lhamoi Latso, a sacred lake south of Lhasa.

 When there happens to be more than one prospective candidate for recognition as a Tulku, and it becomes difficult to decide, there is a practice of making the final decision by divination employing the dough-ball method (zen tak) before a sacred image while calling upon the power of truth.


Yes, you heard right. He will make sure the dastardly Commies don’t sneak in their own Lama by relying on the seeings of spiritual masters, the guidance of other oracles appearing to mediums in a trance, visions in sacred lakes and playing the unbeatable trump card: using the time-honored method of dough ball divination wherein one rolls dough balls round and round a bowl and the one that hops out first will have the name of the Real McCoy, er Gatsyo on it (in it?)!
That’ll show those damn Commies how to to recognize the 15th Lama! If the spiritual masters are taking a day off or the mediums are so tranced out and possessed that they’re unintelligible speaking in the tongues of devils, and if the vision in the spirit lake is a bit cloudy that day, well hot damn we got the dough balls to nail it down tighter than a clam’s ass, and that’s watertight!

Can you believe this shit?

These two, pick any two ….make Forrest Gump look like a genius:
nicholas kristoffdumbanddumber2dalailama2forrestgump
“Life is like a box of dough balls…”





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